It is essential that an aspirant after God should have a Guru to guide him on the path. A true Guru is one who has known Brahman and is one with Brahman. The glories of the Sadguru cannot be exhausted in words, because he reflects divine excellence and is infinite in nature. At critical junctures in human history, God Himself appears on earth in embodiment, assuming the role of the Guru and the savior.
One comes across a divine personage only by the grace of God. It is said that when the Jiva aspires for God-vision, the Guru will come to him or Providence will mysteriously take the seeker to the feet of the Guru. Men belong to two categories: the seekers of material pleasure and the seekers of spiritual salvation. Men of the former category always pursue pleasure in the objects of the world. They are deluded to think that material comforts would bring peace and security. The men of the latter category, namely, the seekers of liberation, know the hollowness of earthly vanities. They long for the infinite bliss of God-experience. With this spiritual yearning in their hearts, they adore the ascetics and sannyasis as symbols of renunciation. They establish contacts with them with the hope that they will get solace, satisfaction and spiritual uplift.
Having set God-realization as the prime goal of life, I have been carrying an unspeakable burden and restlessness in my mind, in quest of God and search after the ideal Guru. I yearned to see one who personified divinity, who could authoritatively teach me the sacred wisdom, who could lead me to the goal. A few years ago, I took to spiritual disciplines and have been following a particular yoga path. But real satisfaction did not come to me. Anguish tormented my heart; craving for eternal bliss possessed my inner being; many times, musing over my predicament, I thought within myself that there would be no silver lining in the dark clouds hovering over my path of quest. I used to estimate and re-estimate my ways of worship and meditation, adopting added methods besides my principal way of sadhana. It was at this moment of inner turmoil that destiny gave me the privilege of acquaintance of an elevated soul, a staunch disciple of Divine Mother Sree Rama Devi, Mrs. Shanta Kudva by name. With astonishing patience and affection of a mother, she consoled me. She narrated to me every day numerous aspects and leelas of the wonderful divine personality of her Guru. These narrations of Divine Mother’s glory and her own life of devotion, convinced me that here was a Divine Personage who could lead all, along the right and real path towards God-experience. I saw the photographs of Divine Mother depicting diverse bhavas, Mahabhavas and Bhavaveshas, that revealed Her exalted divine state. An awareness dawned on me that a Guru who can so easily assume the bhavas of various divinities and Avatars of God, must be transcendental in nature.
My contacts with Divine Mother’s disciples increased. At this time, Mother’s program at Bangalore during May 1970 was announced. I attended the program, I was made to sit very near Mother, which gave me the blissful opportunity of observing Mother’s radiant personality to my heart’s content. Bhajan was in full swing. Mother slipped into Samadhi. My gaze got involuntarily fixed on her form and figure. Her motionless statuesque form, the divine calm on Her face and the vibrations of elevating spirituality which She radiated: these produced an arresting silence within me. I felt a strange current rising up through my spinal column. As it was ascending, my thoughts gradually lost hold on me. At a certain stage, the mind was almost thought-free. A blissful awareness alone remained. After some time, I felt the downward pull and the mind again descended to the plane of thoughts. The memory of that experience of thought-free silence thrilled me, increasing my yearning for lasting spiritual experience. This was the first time, I had such an experience. This was remarkable for a person who had no access to spiritual realm. Here was a power, I thought, whose very presence could impart a spiritual calm and bestow a sublime experience.
The next occasion of my darshan of Divine Mother was during November 1970 when there was a program for Divine Mother for about four days. With a prayerful mind, I took Mother’s darshan several times at close quarters. Though, I had no occasion of speaking to Mother, I knew that my mind was an open book for her all-seeing vision. As I was garlanding Mother’s Lotus Feet, the thought uppermost in my mind found spontaneous expression through Her lips. During the crowded program, I was amazed to observe the “sahaja” poise of Divine Mother amidst surrounding outburst of bhakti and ceremonial demonstrations of worship. A smile played and constantly stayed on Her lips, as Her natural attribute. Whether the atmosphere as charged with commotion or quietude, there was not even the slightest change in Her attitude and responses. Her immortal peace revealed the spontaneity of Her Brahmic Consciousness. She appeared to be the very embodiment of absolute perfection.
During the diamond jubilee celebrations of Divine Mother held at Ahmednagar, more and more facets of Mother’s personality were revealed to me. I saw Her absorbed in samadhi; I saw Her in different divine moods and bhavas; I saw Her as Supreme Shakti, wielding mystic mudras and blessing the world of jivas; I saw Her responding to devotion, receiving worship in supreme detachment; I saw Her in animated conversation with the bhaktas and the purohits; I saw Her distributing prasad to the poor showering mercy on each and every one; I saw Her delivering discourses on profound themes of spirituality. In the midst of all these activities, She was still in Her supreme spiritual isolation, maintaining Her serenity and unbroken divine calmness. During the ceremonial procession, Her form used to glow and appeared to be changing in size.
With these contacts and experience, I got thoroughly convinced of Mother’s divinity. Still, a tiny veil stood between me and my peace. I had heard from many people that it was a great mistake and perhaps unpardonable to leave one’s guru and take to another spiritual personage for guidance. Doubt and fear were lurking deep within me on account of this. Emotionally, I belonged to Mother and Her path; but the doubt within me did not allow me to throw myself completely at Mother’s Feet. It was at this stage that I happened to attend a class talk of Divine Mother. During that talk, Mother referred to the Avataric personality as the Guru of the world. Being the Guru of the gurus, He was the ultimate refuge and savior. At His Feet, there arose no question of whether it was proper to leave one’s Guru or not, for He is the Satchidananda Guru guiding the jivas through personality of various gurus. Mother’s assertive assurance that She would accept all those who take refuge in Her dispelled the clouds of doubt, fear and uncertainity from my mind. I accepted Her as my Guide, Guru and Goal.
Divinity is not a truth to be proved by logical reasoning. It is to be perceived through the eye of faith. Faith dawns only by God’s grace. Marvelous faith in Divine Mother’s gift to Her children. With this faith in their possession, even death poses no challenge to them. They leave the body in the profound peace of Truth-vision. Death thus becomes a passage to peace and blessedness for them. A few months ago, I myself have seen with my own eyes how faith can make men immortal, how Divine Mother’s grace can liberate the jiva from the samsaric bondage. It was Friday the 20th August, 1971. After finishing his office duties, Shri P. N. Kudva, an elderly disciple of Divine Mother, returned home at about 6 p.m. He was looking hale and healthy as everybody knew him. There used to be bhajan programs at his house every Tuesdays and Fridays. That afternoon, he went out to bring some household articles from the nearby town. At the time of ‘mangalarathi’ he entered the bhajan hall in his house and took prasadam. He chatted with all the devotees. At about 8.30 p.m. or so, he complained about a slight chest pain. His wife gave him a cup of mild adding a little pooja prasadam to it and started rubbing his chest with a pain balm, all the while repeating Mother’s Name. After some time, he became absolutely alright. Then suddenly, he turned his head towards the nearby photograph of Divine Mother and remained in that posture with his eyes fixed on Mother. Without any violent breathing or shaking of the body, that blessed soul left the body in absolute peace. A smile and a profound peace were observed on his countenance until his body was cremated at Mercara. When an ordinary man dies, he makes such a commotion that personas standing nearby will have a frightening sight, but Kudvamam’s face reflected absolute serenity indicating thereby that death had no victory over him, but he conquered death by his ecstatic merger at Divine Mother’s Lotus Feet.
Out of innumerable incidents, the above is just one that suggest the supreme divinity and saving power of our Divine Mother. The Divine alone can liberate the jivas. Whenever I think of Divine Mother’s redeeming grace, I am reminded of the promise given by Bhagawan Sree Krishna:
“Fix your mind on Me; be devoted to Me; sacrifice to Me; prostrate before Me; so shall you come to Me. This is My pledge to you, for you are dear to Me.”
– A. M. Devaiah.